Chasing Stars and Losing Shadows: Fly With Me
by Snowfallxo
Summary: When an accident leaves one of the members of Connect 3 wheelchair-bound with a broken heart, only a miracle can bring together the pieces: a miracle in the form of an old camp friend who's not like Nate remembers her. co-written with chibiyugixyami.
1. prologue

Have you ever been in a situation where it's just moving so fast that you can't feel anything, not even the sensation of extreme pain? It's like you're rolling down a hill and you just can't stop, and even though there are tons of prickles and branches that you're rolling over as gravity pulls you down, you can't feel a thing. But afterwards, it hurts. Hurts like crazy, hurts like hell, hurts like nothing you'll ever feel again in your life.

That's what heartbreak feels like. When you're thrown down the mountain of love, at first you're numb. You feel no pain. But then it hurts. And you're not sure that you're ever going to recover again.

As you sit there, crying, nursing your cuts, bruises, broken bones, and concussions, you've got a choice – you can leave it all behind you can start picking up the pieces, or you can dwell forever on the past. Dwelling won't get you anywhere, but once you break your heart once – it breaks easier the second time. And the second time, it hurts even more.

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_if it's you and me forever,_

_if it's you and me right now,_

_that'd be alright, be alright._

It's never alright. It always breaks. 'Right now' will come to an end. It will. It always ends.

"Nate…"

"Save your breath." My fingers clasp the wheel but my arms aren't strong enough to push them. I feel stuck, trapped in a lie and confined to a chair.

"Why won't you listen?" she whispers, the words barely reaching my ears. "I can explain…"

I open my mouth to reply, but it didn't seem worth it. She had caused this, caused this metaphorical quicksand to build around me, helping me to my confinement. I grasp the metal in my hand again and move it slightly. The wheels beneath me begin to move. I push faster. Away, away.

_if we chase the stars to lose our shadows_

_Peter Pan and Wendy turned out fine_

_so won't you fly with me_

Flying means crashing. Crashing is what I did. Crashing is hurting. Hurting is breaking. A breaking heart.

She runs to my side in a second, ten times faster on her legs than I am in my wheelchair. Jason had called it a good "upper body workout." I had glared at him. That was the last thing I wanted to look at this as – it wasn't a good thing from any perspective. "Seriously, Nate, listen."

"Look at yourself!" I practically shriek. "Unscathed, unharmed. Now look at me. I don't need anymore pain from you, physical or emotional. If you could grasp the meaning of alone, then maybe you'd understand. It's okay to be away from me. It's okay not to smother me with love. You're going to have to get used to it, girl, because I'm not going to be around to be your little 'love bunny' anymore." I spit out the last words with a tone of hate – a nickname that I tolerated for just a little too long.

"One more chance. Please."

I gave her a more than a chance. I gave her my life, my reputation, everything. It was stupid. I regretted every single move.

I gave her my heart, and I got back pieces.


	2. take a breath

A/N: So it's been a long time. So a lot has happened.

And then today, three months after posting the prologue, a message pops up in my inbox that someone has "added your story to his/her Story Alert subscription." And I'm like, holy crap, I haven't updated in FOREVER. So haha. Chapter one. As promised.

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**chapter one: take a breath**

It's tiring. You feel weak. You feel helpless. You feel embarrassed when everyone stares at you as you wheel yourself to the other side of the mall, or the parking lot, or the street. You hate it when your brothers have to push you around everywhere. You hate it when you're told that you look like Nate from "that band" Connect 3. You hate it when you –

"Nate? Is that you?"

I turned my head ever-so-slightly to look at the person who said my name. "No, it's my evil twin," I said at a poor attempt at sarcasm.

Mitchie was by my side in a matter of seconds, Shane at her heels. The last thing I wanted was to be pestered by him right now, and since Mitchie is basically a part of him, that included her. I envied how they could run, how free they were. "I heard… I'm sorry," she stuttered out pathetically.

"Uhm, thanks?" I didn't quite know what to say to people who were apologizing yet. It wasn't their fault. It was all _her_ fault. It was my fault.

"You broke up with Bailey, didn't you?" It was a rhetorical question, but I nodded my yes to Shane anyway. "Why? You were so happy with her!"

"You wouldn't understand." I hung my head in shame, not wanting to recall the moment. I'd explain later, maybe when Mitchie wasn't around. "It's… well, complicated."

"For you, Nate, everything's complicated." Mitchie, kneeling by my chair, looked extremely apologetic. I envied Shane even more now, not only because he could walk, but because he had such a loyal (but not _too_ loyal) girlfriend who didn't make him… or he had a too-loyal girlfriend but didn't seem to mind it.

I pushed back tears as I simultaneously pushed back memories. No. I couldn't think about it. I wasn't going to lose it in front of my bandmate and his girlfriend, not to mention all the other people at the mall. A guy like me didn't cry. A normal guy wouldn't cry. But I wanted to cry, I wanted to let loose all my emotions, I wanted someone to listen. I wanted to talk to someone who knew what this was like, to feel the feeling of being confined to a chair. Yes, everything was complicated, but everything was also just so ridiculously simple.

_Let it go, Nate, let her go…_

I sighed. "Excuse me," I muttered, and very carefully steered my wheelchair away from the couple, trying not to run over their feet. After that, it was easier to navigate – people tended to take pity on the boy in the wheelchair and moved out of the way more often than not. I wanted to find a quiet place where I could take out that guitar and vent in the only way I knew how – music, singing, and songwriting.

It wasn't like I meant to be stereotypical about people in wheelchairs, but it's just something about it that screams "I can't walk" that makes people feel sorry for you. I hated it. I hated people who did take pity on me, or at least people who I could hate and they'd never know. Hating someone like your bandmates or your bandmates' girlfriends was much, much harder. They end up finding out, eventually. Hating someone like your ex was easier – she probably hated you, too.

There was a small grassy knoll outside the mall, pushed into seclusion next to a wildlife preserve. I smiled and rolled down the small hill, right next to a bench bordering the forest. That's when I took out my guitar and began to play, not a new song, but an old song.

"I walk across--"

I let out a frustrated groan. No. Why. Even this? I went back and corrected myself.

"I _roll _across a crowded street, a sea of eyes cut through me… and I saw you in the middle. Your upset face, you wear it well, you camouflage the way you feel when everything's the matter…"

Yeah, we've all been down that road before, searching for that something more… but really, now, what was I searching for now that I'd lost her? I didn't regret my decision to break up with her, but I didn't exactly like it. I think it was what was best for us. We could never be friends again, probably never talk to each other, but the more I thought about it, the more I knew that the decision was right.

"…people change and promises are broken…"

Hell yeah. You ever think that doesn't happen? It's not only promises that are broken – you'll end up with broken hearts as well. It really is like walking on broken glass – and for once, some of the philosophy of our songs begin to make more sense than they did before. Better believe I bled.

"…blink our eyes, life's rearranged…"

To our surprise… it's still okay? Who wrote that? (I did. That's not the point.) It wasn't okay. Things changed. Life was rearranged. People change. And yes, promises are broken. (Again, not the point.) I was stuck in this wheelchair now for an entire year, with two broken legs that were broken in five places each. It hurt, it hurt, it hurt, but I could barely feel it – the feeling of my heart breaking was more prominent.

But the main feeling I felt was numbness, like I was missing something. Not something, someone. Not Bailey, but someone else…

"Nate!"

This time it was Jason who broke my silent contemplation. "What?" I demanded.

"We're going now," he said, getting behind my chair and starting to push me. I scowled, but didn't protest aloud. I guess I had to feel helpless. I guess I had to get used to it. "We should get to the airport so we can go back home and pack for camp."

Camp. Wow. I'd almost forgotten, in the midst of everything. With a sad sinking feeling, I realized that Bailey was going to be there. Did I really have to go? Would I actually be able to get around in this bulky chair of mine, or would Shane and Jason be stuck pushing me around the whole time? "Okay. Lead the way," I said dryly, ignoring the stares I was getting from people around us.

"What's your problem?" he asked me. "You seem sad."

"Wow, Jason, I wonder why!" I said, my voice heavily overlaid with sarcasm. "Could it possibly be the fact that you're stuck pushing me around for a year of my life, or that my ex-girlfriend is a cling-on bitch?"

"I think it seems cool." The idiot didn't know what it felt like… "The chair, I mean, not Bailey."

"You think wrong." I didn't bother to full-out argue.

He gave the chair a little thrust as it slides off the curb. I bounced in my seat. If I fell out, I'd be helpless, especially with my plaster boots that went up to my knees. "Be careful!" I snapped, holding my tongue. I had worse words to say, but I'd save them for Shane, who can actually tolerate that stuff.

"Sorry," he whispered.

"I can do this myself, Jason, thanks anyway," I told him, bending my head backwards so I could at least attempt to look him in the eye.

He looked surprised at my sudden change of mood, but mood swings were common for me. Besides being stuck in a wheelchair, I struggled with a million other things. Like diabetes. Like relationship problems. Like being a world famous rockstar – and being stuck in a wheelchair. That sort of stuff. "Fine, suit yourself," he said, giving me a final push.

My hands scrambled to the wheel grips as I coasted towards a display of toilet paper rolls right in the middle of the aisle, changing my path only just in time to keep myself from crashing into them. I gritted my teeth but didn't yell back to Jason. Hopefully he'd have enough sense to follow me - knowing Jason, he'd get lost if he didn't.

I worked my way quickly through the mall to the other side where the limo was supposed to be parked (it was not a handicap-accessible limo, fyi), avoiding people's feet and shopping bags wherever I went, receiving the same old stares. Nothing had changed. At least it was partially comforting to know that people would stare anyway, me being… me, a teenage rockstar, and all. I didn't feel like a rockstar, however, I felt like some ordinary kid who had gotten hurt playing football or some sport like that. I hated the feeling of not feeling different – because that's exactly what it was to me, different. Even in a wheelchair I fit in more than I did as a celebrity.

Mental note to self – do not go too in depth with thoughts when using a wheelchair.

Luckily, it wasn't a person I crashed into, but instead a large cutout of a person – Edward Cullen, from those Twilight books – which eventually ended up hitting someone on the head. "Shit," I muttered, hoping no one could hear me. I backed up a couple of steps – um, or paces of wheelchair?

"I'm sorry," I said softly.

I'm not shy. I've never been shy, just quiet, so whatever made me so shy was completely a fluke. "It's okay," the girl I'd (actually, Edward did it, to be precise) hit in the head. She gave me one of those looks of pity. I scowled. "You're probably not quite used to that… mode of transportation."

"Two days ago I was walking," I said, a little scornfully. "Two days ago I could do flips and run around just like just about any other teenager."

"Most teenagers can't do flips." She smiled anyway. "You have a trampoline that you do – uhm, did – these flips on?"

"Didn't need one." It was conversation, boring conversation at that, but it was something to talk about.

"Oh."

I blushed. "Sorry for blabbing and such… I'm Nate." I held out my hand to her at an attempt at politeness.

"Caitlyn." She shook my hand.

The name sounded familiar, and I struggled to match it with a face. Some old school friend, maybe, or one of those million fangirls we'd met at meet and greets. Sigh. I was kinda hoping for someone who knew…

"See you around," I said, wheeling the chair backwards, looking over my shoulder.

"Yeah," she echoed. "See you."

There was something about her… something that said I would see her again…

But this was the same voice in my brain that told me that Bailey was the one for me. The same voice that steered me wrong so many times. If I couldn't trust myself…

…who exactly was there for me to trust?


	3. don't charge me for the crime

A/N: I've tried everything to try to kill my writer's block. I've Googled it and searched 13 pages in, I've written all sorts of stupid fluff, I even repeated my whole day to try and dream a story plot again. My verdict: it might work for a Jonas, but it didn't for me. All that I did was drop my cell phone in yogurt twice. -sigh- Oh well. Chapter two! (I don't seem to have writer's block on this story – maybe it's because I re-discovered it again. Or maybe it's because I have a week and a half or so until school starts. All my out-of-state friends already started. Haha.)

This chapter is mainly Nate's flashbacks, marked by the _italics_. With some... interesting scenes. (You find out how Nate broke his legs!) Rated T for teen. (But you knew that.)

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**chapter two: don't charge me for the crime**

"We're here!" Jason announced.

I took the extra effort to lift one of my thirty-pound casts and kicked him as hard as I could (which wasn't that hard) in the shin. "Thanks, Captain Obvious," I muttered, looking out the window once again at the scenic setting of Camp Rock.

"Oh, come on, Nate, be just a little happy? For me?" Jason pled, giving me a pathetic-looking puppy dog face.

Honestly. Why did Shane get his own car? Oh, right, because he could drive. And Jason and I couldn't. (Jason had failed his test because he almost drove off a cliff and swore at his instructor when he told him that he didn't pass. Me? I passed mine with flying colors. Apparently setting a fashion trend in footwear with plaster boots means you can't drive.)

I put on a cheesy smile. "Yay, I get to see Bailey and everyone else in my life that I hate!" Which wasn't much of anyone, to be honest. Just Bailey. Feeling mean, I added, "That includes you, occasionally."

Jason paid no attention to my comment. "Thanks, Simon," he said, gesturing to the taxi driver and giving him however much money we owed. Probably extra, since we had to request a handicap-accessible cab for me. And he was probably going to make me pay him back because I told him we weren't taking the limo. Sighing, I rolled my chair down the ramp Simon had set up, thinking about how much I really hated special treatment.

Almost instantly I was surrounded by at least ten different people, all with the same question: "What happened, Nate?" "Nate, are you okay?" "How'd you break your legs?"

"It was an accident," I muttered, trying to move my chair, but I was surrounded. Another disadvantage: I couldn't elbow my way through people.

"What sort of accident?" a girl asked.

Tears started to well up in my eyes as I recalled it. It wasn't something I wanted to remember, but yet, it came so easily to mind…

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"_Nate," she said, sitting down on the bed beside me. Our eyes met, and I knew what she was thinking – the exact opposite of me. I sighed and surrendered to her, and she brought be close, way closer than I'd ever been to a girl in my entire life. I started to kiss her, long, deep kisses… we rolled over on the bed. Her mouth felt so warm and soft on mine, but this was just wrong._

"_I can't do this," I said, pulling away. She tried to kiss me one more time, but I didn't let her. I had to show courage here. I tugged on the ring on my finger, and it slid off easily, a promise so easily broken. "I really, really can't."_

"_Oh, come on, love bunny," she said, crooning the nickname I hated so much, slurring her words together. _

_Oh. So she was drunk._

_She came closer to me again, no matter how hard I tried pushing her away. I kicked and squirmed, but I couldn't get away from the smell of her perfume mixed with the smell of alcohol that I'd always found repulsive. Shane drank, sure, but he had a little sense, and a bit more of the rockstar ego than I did. Jason did as well. I never did. It never quite seemed right to me._

"_Nate," she called to me. I turned to open the door but it wouldn't open. Her arms were cool on mine as she embraced me again, and her weight brought me down to the floor as she rolled with me. She tried to kiss me. I bit her, completely on purpose._

"_The door's locked, sweetheart," she said. I growled like a lion. Damn it._

"_Let go of me!" I shrieked, leaping up from the floor. "I love you, Bailey, but you need to learn to give me some space."_

_She stood, shoulders squared, six inches away from me. "There. Space."_

"_Not enough."_

_She moved closer again, pushing me closer and closer to the open window. I tried to move, but she blocked me, keeping me stumbling backwards over my feet._

"_I love you, Nate," she whispered._

_I didn't reply. Really, I couldn't._

_We hit the wall two inches away from the window. I tried pushing her away yet again, but she persevered. In panic, I tried to run to the side, but she pushed me closer to what she thought was the wall…_

_Suddenly, I lost my footing and felt myself falling through air. I didn't scream, although I wanted too. How many stories were we up, now? Three? I couldn't think, my brain was thinking too fast while everything was falling down around me in slow motion._

_And then reality came around me as I landed on a pavement with a thud and a crack. I shrieked silently in pain, blood suddenly all over my legs, and something white stuck out of my left leg, bent in a position that I knew wasn't right. My right leg wasn't nearly as bloody, but bent horribly out of position._

"_Help," I croaked, lying on the sidewalk. I didn't want to die._

"_Nate?" a familiar voice whispered. "Oh my gosh, Nate!"_

_Mitchie stood above me, Shane right by her side. I could barely breathe, for lack of clean, sane air to breathe. Groaning, I let the last little hold I had on reality slip through my fingers._

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"Excuse me," I muttered to the crowd above me, grasping the wheel. They parted, leaving me a pathway up to the wheelchair ramp. Well, at least someone was smart when designing the camp.

"Hello, Nate. Hello, Jason." Uncle Brown came walking down the path towards me as Jason grabbed the handles of my chair.

"Hey, Brown, what's up?" Jason asked, but Brown was too busy eying me.

When he opened his mouth to speak, I cut him off. "I fell out of a window, okay?"

Brown looked taken aback at my tone. Shane was normally the one to snap at him, give him the rockstar attitude. But me? "I'm sorry to hear that," he said carefully, smiling an apologetic smile. "We'll try to make things easier, I promise."

That wasn't quite what I wanted, but I nodded anyway, just to be polite. "Thanks," I muttered as Jason started pushing me again. At this point, I felt like I was in a stroller. "I can take it from here," I added to Jason, pushing myself faster.

He rolled his eyes. "Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure. Stop taking pity on me and pretend that I'm walking."

"But you're not."

"Just pretend."

"But you're not."

I sighed. "Remember when we were six and we used to play with those G.I. Joes and cut the next-door neighbor's Barbie's hair?" Jason nodded. "Pretend like that."

"So you're my doll…?"

I groaned. "You know what, never mind."

"I don't get you, Nate," he sighed, walking by my chair.

"No one ever does," I told him. "Not even me."

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"_Is he going to be okay?" I heard my little brother ask._

"_He'll be fine," assured my mom, Shane, and Jason all at the same time. Part of me knew that they actually cared._

"_The anesthesia should be wearing off any second now," the doctor added. "The knee surgery went fine, and his stitches are great as well. We just have to put his left leg in a cast." He added after a second, "I'm just not quite sure how he broke his legs so badly in the first place."_

"_What was he doing, jumping out of a window, anyway?" Jason asked._

_There was the sound of a door closing as someone entered or left the room. "I don't know," Shane said. "I wasn't there to see him jump, I didn't even see him land. Mitchie did, though."_

"_I didn't jump! She pushed me out!" I wanted to tell them, but what was the point? I was supposed to be unconscious. And besides, I never talked in my sleep. I just kept my pathetic thoughts to myself._

_Someone's hand was in mine suddenly, a familiar whisper in my ear. "Nathan, I'm sorry," Bailey whispered._

_But inside I knew I would never accept her apology._

_------_

"Hey!" I heard Shane's voice in the back of my mind, jolting me right back to the present. "How are you doing?" The question seemed to be directed at both me and Jason, but I knew it was mostly me who was supposed to answer. To piss him off, I stayed silent.

"Good," Jason said. I just kept rolling as I came to the stairs of our cabin. A ramp, clumsily constructed out of plywood, had been set up where a railing used to be. Despite myself, I smiled. Shane had really tried. I was fifty-percent sure it would collapse if I started rolling up it, but it was great to know someone tried, even if it meant destroying a camp cabin in the process. We were million-dollar popstars, he'd get away with it.

The ramp was much sturdier than it looked, and easy to navigate. "Thanks, Shane," I said once I had gotten to the top. He smiled and just waved a little as a response.

I hadn't been to Camp Rock since we'd become famous, and yet it felt so familiar to me, the beds set up in just the right places, the same camp air. I just thought that when I came back, I'd be walking through the front door.

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_The doctor knelt by my bed, flashing a light in my eyes, squeezing my hand, asking me pointless questions. "Do you remember your name?"_

_I snorted. "Of course."_

_He looked at me expectantly, like I was supposed to say it. "Oh. I'm Nate. Nate Grey." Part of me wanted to act like a rockstar and be like, "shouldn't you know my name", but I was sure that wasn't appreciated._

_He rolled his eyes. "Teenagers."_

"_Well, Nate, you've got some visitors," he said, making notes on his clipboard. "Your brothers? Shane and Jason?"_

"_Yeah, sure, whatever." I sighed and put my head down on the pillow._

_They came rushing into the room. "Nate! You're okay!" they cried, practically in unison._

"_Yeah, I'm fine," I said, trying not to moan. My feet were falling asleep. Nothing much I could do about that, now was there?_

_Shane eyed me suspiciously. "So, what exactly were you doing, jumping out of a window, anyway?"_

"_I didn't jump." Jason raised his eyebrows at this comment, Shane snorted. "Bailey pushed me out."_

_Shane rolled his eyes. "Way to throw her under the bus, bro," he said._

"_What bus?" Jason asked, turning to Shane._

_I exchanged a look with him and we both started laughing. "It's an expression, Jason," I said gently. "And it's true. She was drunk, and she was getting a little too close, and I tried to run away, but she pushed me up against what she thought was a wall… and I kinda fell right through what was really a window."_

"_So all this happened because you were afraid of having sex?" Jason asked when I was done._

_I made a face. "Well, yeah, to put it bluntly."_

"_What are you going to tell Bailey?" Shane questioned._

"_Well…" I hadn't quite thought of that. "I don't know. I mean, I love her, but is anyone worth two broken legs and knee surgery?"_

_Shane shook his head almost immediately. Jason took a moment to ponder the question. "No, Nate, it really isn't."_

_I sighed. "Yeah, I figured."_

"_Hang in there," Jason said, patting me lightly on the shoulder, and they left the room._

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"He says he was pushed out of the window by his ex-girlfriend," I heard Shane explaining to someone. Wheeling the chair over to the window, I saw that he was talking to Brown. "But we're pretty sure he just jumped. But what's wrong in his life that would make him want to try to commit suicide like that?"

So now I was suicidal?

"Well, what has happened recently that he could get depressed over?" Brown asked.

"He broke up with his girlfriend," Jason suggested.

"That was after he jumped, though," Shane pointed out, "it would have to be something else."

I rolled away from the window in disgust. Of course Bailey was just too innocent and she had to protect her reputation. Because now that I thought of it, she always thought of herself first. Little did she (and I, at the time) know that she would probably end up almost destroying mine. Committing suicide? I wasn't insane, I didn't want to kill myself… the girl just makes me paranoid.

Come to think of it, maybe it wasn't such a bad idea. I'd never see Bailey again if I died. Hopefully. If I stayed here at camp, I'd see her again for sure. She'd be on her knees for me to take her back. I was afraid of what would happen if I didn't. She was known for spreading vicious rumors, for making her exes miserable. Did I want that to happen to me? I was already hurt enough, physically and emotionally. On top of my family thinking I was suicidal, I didn't need the whole world thinking I was something else. Whatever Bailey's creative mind would come up with.

"Nate? Are you ready for dinner?"

I sighed. "Yeah, I'll be right there."

I could change my name and move out of the country. Why did they have to blame me for what happened? Sweet, innocent Bailey. I'd never use those words to describe her, and yet, that's what they did. They charged me with committing suicide and let her off free.

How I wish it could be me flying free of my problems. But a bird with broken wings can't fly.

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A/N: (again) I'm going away for a couple of days against my own will... I want reviews when I come back. Kapeesh? (That's a weird word. Meaning "understand" for any of you people who don't like big words out there. LOL)

**Disclaimer: I don't own Camp Rock. -tear tear- I will take credit for Bailey, though. She's minnneee. -hits Bailey on head so she knows not to be mean to Nate-**


	4. because of you

**A/N: SO GUESS WHO'S UPDATING!!! MEEE! Or, rather, chibiyugixyami, who wrote the entire freaking chapter for me. No inspiration. Which is why it's been six months and no updates. So you all have to go check out her stories or face the wonderful consequences. Please. Because she put all this work into it and I didn't.**

**Although she wrote it like I would, all the way down to the cheesy Owl City references. She knows me that freaking well. :) love you chibs.**

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Being a famous rock star, I should be used to the looks of apprehension, of worry, of the feel of eyes weighing on my back, but no…I was not used to this. Judging by the wary in each person's eyes, they believed whatever dumb rumor Bailey put out there about me, whatever Jason and Shane told them, whatever they thought happened, they believed the wrong thing. Would any ever believe me? I wished I would have never come down to dinner, never found the courage to show my face and when I got over to the table, my appetite was gone and my hands were shaking in rage.

"Hey, Nate!" Mitchie said and the girl next to her caught my attention.

"Caitlyn?" I asked and she nodded and greeted me like an old friend.

"Still in that chair I see, Nate?" She asked, smiling a bit and I rolled my eyes, not needed to be reminded of my current state.

After dinner, there was the campfire, but I knew I would go insane, even with Caitlyn there, with all of the accusing stares and I knew if I went, there was a 100% chance of me meeting Bailey. But when I rolled into the cabin, someone I did want to see was sitting on my bed.

"Hey Nate!" Bailey greeted a huge smile on her face as I faced her with nothing less of a glare.

"What do you want?" I snapped out, finally able to let out my anger one the one person that deserved it.

Bailey pouted a bit but her smile returned. "I wanted to see you because I love you and miss you and I am so sorry!"

I rolled my eyes and growled. "You don't love me and you are only sorry I won't take you back. And what person would after you pushed them out of a window!" I yelled and her smile faltered a bit as anger flashed in her eyes but I continued despite the danger signs. "Because of you, I have two broken legs and everyone thinks I am suicidal! It's your fault everyone is afraid to talk to me, to be around me, and I bet they are all ashamed to have liked me in the band AND they are all pitting me right now and I hate it! I used to like life Bailey but you kind of ruined it for me! It would be so much easier to live if you just left and never came back!" I glared and she glared back, her hand raising and striking me loudly across my cheek and my hand instantly went to it, as if to comfort the sting.

"Don't you dare accuse me of something I did not do! It's your fault you were afraid and jumped! It's your own fault, not mine!" she yelled and shock replaced the anger but it came back.

"HOW CAN YOU DENY THE TRUTH!!! YOU ALMOST KILLED ME!" I screamed and she raised her hand but I caught it this time, both of us glaring daggers.

"I wish your little jump would have done its job!" she hissed back before wrenching her hand from my grip and storming off into the night.

I could have followed her and kept up, but I did not want to prolong this dumb fight but I did want to set her straight…but then again, I did know that this was going to happen eventually, but I would not let her beat me. No one beats Nate Grey.

I picked up my guitar, no melody coming to mind but as strange as it sounds, it made me feel better to hold the familiar object tightly. I sat there in silence for a minute, debating if I should attempt to go to the fire in the twilight or play it safe and stay up here like a coward. But before I could decide, I heard someone run up to the cabin and open the door just as I set my guitar down and turned to face the new comer; Shane.

"Hey Nate, you ok? You seem mad." Shane asked sitting on the bed in front of me that Bailey had previously occupied.

"Irritated actually, but good guess." I said, trying to keep the said irritation from my voice and failing at it.

"I bet… look I just met Bailey and she was in tears, telling them how you jumping and framing it on her really shook her and she's afraid you'll try it again," he told me, meaning well but I couldn't take it. Another person falling prey to Bailey's lies.

I sighed angrily and ran my hand through my curls, wishing I could go and run to make Bailey tell the truth and stop spreading rumors. "Look Shane, I did not jump! I already told you what happened and that was the truth! She is mad that I broke up with her and won't take her back like she tried to get me to do minutes before you walked in! She is telling these lies so people will feel sorry for her and hate me!" I nearly yelled in frustration.

Shane shook his head. "That's enough Nate. Stop lying about this. What in your life was so bad that you jumped and decided to blame it on Bailey when you failed?" He calmly as but my mouth dropped to the floor in rage and shock.

"Fine, believe Bailey and not your own brother." I spat out before quickly wheeling away but I was barely four feet form the cabin when I heard the door burst open and Shane stopped me by pulling back on the stupid wheelchairs handles. Another down side to being a cripple, you can't walk away. "Leave me alone Shane. I'm not going to kill myself and I've never even wanted too so stop worrying about me!"

Shane walked in front of me and kneeled, placing his hands on my shoulders and I looked up at a squirrel to avoid his gaze. "Nate, I'm just trying to help." He tried but I shook my head.

"You can help me be believing me and putting a stop to Bailey's reign." I answered, my voice carrying an edge and Shane shook his head.

"Nate, the evidence…look bro, I know this is tough for you but Jason and I are here for you if you ever need to vent."

"You're there for me and yet you don't trust me. Thanks Shane, that makes me feel so much better knowing my own brother thinks I am suicidal." I said coldly before shrugging his hands form my shoulders and wheeling around him, knowing he would not follow this time and I was right, but unfortunately, I met Jason coming up from the fire concert.

"Nate! Have you seen Shane?" He asked and I shook my head. "What's bugging you?"

I sighed; maybe gullible Jason would believe me instead of that she-demon Bailey. "Bailey and I fought a few minutes ago because I wouldn't take her back so now she is telling the whole camp a lie. I am NOT and have never been suicidal! You know that, right Jason?" I practically begged and Jason bit his lip and I got my answer from that before growling and wheeling past him, muttering darkly about how no one, not even my own brothers, would trust the truth.

I rolled down to the now empty fire pit and stage and sighed, just starring at the calm lake and thinking about how this place used to feel so much like home, but I guess this summer, home will always be here, but just unseen, out of sight. Where I want to disappear and hide and think of dreamy things as I'm waving goodbye, so I'll spread my wings and fly. But I already knew a bird with a broken wing had as much chance at flying as a human with two broken legs did with walking.

"Nate?" A girl's voice rang out and I looked up to see Caitlyn walking to me, a concerned expression on her face.

"Look, if you've come to patronize me about some lie that Bailey told you…" I began but she cut across me.

"No, I came to tell you I don't believe a word that lying witch said. Mitchie doesn't understand it but I do. She's angry at you from breaking up with her and told the lie. I get it." She told me and actually got a smile out of me.

"You're about the only one that does." And she smiled, sitting down on the stage and looking at the lake with me.

"I don't believe that." She smiled and I actually felt a bit better.

We were able to sit here for about an hour in comfortable silence before Shane and Jason ran up, yelling how they found me, but it wasn't like I was hiding. Jason started pushing me away, against my protests so I said goodbye to Caitlyn, who smiled and repeated the same words. At least one person understood the truth.

They pushed me back up to the cabin and I was pleasantly surprised to see Shane's ramp could hold my weight, the wheelchair's weight and Jason's weight at once. Points for Shane. But when thy pushed me back into the cabin, Brown was there and he looked cross….which was odd for him.

"Nate. Thank you boys for finding him." Jason and Shane nodded before leaving and I faced Brown, already feeling apprehensive. "Nate, Bailey has said some intersecting lies about you. What has brought them on?"

I snorted. "Which lies exactly? That I'm suicidal or something other crap?" Brown did not say so I continued. "Look, when I came up here after dinner, she was waiting for me, saying she was sorry, she missed me and loved me, thinking I would take her back and I didn't and we both got angry. But only she will act on that anger and spread lies.

"While you take it out on your friends and family." Brown finished and I nodded feeling guilty. "I don't blame you Nate, this is a hard time for you and everything bad always sees to happen to you, what with your diabetes and now this. I know it is hard but I can't say I've ever been in your shoes before. But I will try and keep the rumors in check alright? You do not need to worry about a thing." He assured me and I nodded smiling again. Wow, two smiles in one bad day, I was on a role.

"Thanks." He waved it off like a fly.

"Its no bother Nate. I'll see you tomorrow and you'd better be smiling lad."He told me, a smirk on his own face and I nodded, smiling again and he waved before leaving.

Jason and Shane walked in but neither said a word to me…I guess they still believed me to be what I am not. What do I have to do to convince my own brothers? If I can ever convince them…

How did it come to this? I never meant to start a war or hurt anyone; I don't even know what they were fighting for. But how can they fight a war if there is only one side fighting?  
I blinked and lunged for my guitar, instantly finding the right melody and everything seemed to dissolve around me as I sang a song I would call World War Three. When I finished, I saw I was alone in the dark cabin, feeling rather abandoned because my own brothers didn't even want to be around me. And this feeling was one music couldn't fix, only numb until I started fighting to be heard but I did not want to start a war. But Bailey did and it was me and Caitlyn versus her and the rest of the camp…and I did not like those odds.

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**A/N: Again, millions and billions of thanks and everything to chibiyugixyami for writing the chapter... I hope I can update more frequently, but no promises. I've had ideas for other CR fics but I have too many other ones right now... sigh. Maybe later. Hopefully.**

**disclaimer: I don't own anything... sigh.**


	5. u got nothing on me

**A/N: Um, yeah. Hi. I didn't write this chapter either. See how absolutely awful I am? Credit again goes to chibiyugixyami. For being completely, totally, 100% plobnrg and awesome. You deserve the world's everything. Nick should be _happy _he has you to torture him. you rock, girl.**

**Disclaimer: I think the above statement gave up my rights to everything. So chibi's my new co-author. (Don't feel obliged to write anything, girl, just you've written just as much as I have so I need to give you more credit. Or I feel like I do.)**

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Alone. That was what I was. I wheeled myself through the camp, meeting glares and whispers of false gossip head on as I tried to remain calm. But it was hard. Caitlyn was wrong. She was the only person, other than Brown, in this whole camp that believed me. And I hated that everyone would rather believe the person that almost killed me instead of the person suffering. I hated that, because of Bailey, this camp which used to feel like my home, now felt like a prison. Someplace where I didn't belong and yet everyone seemed to think I did. Why does this always happen to me?

I pushed myself to the dock where Shane had sang "Gotta Find You" to Mitchie last year and sighed. I undid the stupid safety belt on this stupid chair and hauled myself so I was sitting on the bench, my back to the water. I ran my fingers through my curls, unsure what to do. And I hated that feeling. I was Nate Grey! I always knew what to do! And Bailey took that ability from me as well.

"Hey Nate!" I looked up at the sound of my name, surprised to hear no ridicule after it and I smiled when I saw Caitlyn walking down to me. She sat next to me, smiling too.

"Hey." I answered, trying to keep the stress out of my voice. "You hear the rumors?"

She rolled her eyes and nodded. "Not like I believe them. I mean what crap! Nate Grey on drugs and slapping his 'poor' and 'confused' girlfriend and then attempting suicide for it. How thick does Bailey think people are?"

I sighed, looking to the water. "Well considering they believe her…"

"Nate, stop it." She ordered and I turned to her. "Don't let her get to you. If you do, she will have won and I know you don't want that!" She looked over to the camp with something like a glare on her face. "Besides, better gossip than silence."

I shook my head. "The silence isn't so bad."

Caitlyn looked back at me and pursed her lips. "I guess you're right, in some ways. But would you like silence from everyone, including me?"

Again I shook my head. "No, I guess not. But are you real or are you just a decoy dream in my head?" I half joked and she sighed, throwing her hands in the air.

"You're hopeless!" But she was smiling. "Well Nate, does this feel like a dream?" Her smile turned devious as my eyes turned wide. She lunged forward and was tickling my sides, me squirming to get away from her and laughing, unable to stop.

"CRIPPLE UNDER ATTACK!" I yelled softly between my chuckles and Caitlyn stopped, cracking up, trying to catch her breath.

"So am I real now?" She asked her eyes light.

"My sides confirmed that you are." I smiled.

But unbeknownst to us, someone was watching this scene unfold. Someone with jealously in their heart and a scowl on their face.

"Caitlyn!" We both turned to see Mitchie running up. She paused for a second when she saw me but she tried to cover it with a smile. "Hey guys." She greeted, but her words more for Caitlyn then me. "Caitlyn, we need to go help Brown with the Open Mike tonight. Come on!" She grabbed Caitlyn's hand and towed her away form me.

"See you later Nate!" She yelled, waving and I waved back, forcing a smile. The action was hard when even Mitchie, my brother's girlfriend, didn't believe me. She didn't trust me because my brother's didn't trust me and the camp didn't trust me because no else did. Stupid Bailey.

"Hey Nate!" Speak of the devil. "I hope you learned your lesson about spreading lies about me." She stated, standing right in front of me and I met her glare evenly, with one of my own.

"No actually I haven't. Because I'm not the one lying." I growled and she scowled, looking to the lake. But her expression cleared and she smiled again.

"Are your casts water proof?" She asked rather nicely and I was caught off guard by the sudden change in personality.

"Yeah, they are. Why?" I asked, suspicious of her.

"Oh, no reason." And then she pushed me, quite hard in the chest, and I tumbled over the edge. "So I can finish what should have been done!" I heard her yell before I hit the water.

I uselessly flailed my arms, trying to stop myself from sinking, but the weight of the casts were too much for me. So I sank, wondering how deep this part of the lake was and I panicked, wondering if anyone was close enough to hear the splash or Bailey's scream. This is bad. This is really bad. Not only does it reinforce Bailey's lie but I think I might land on that crab. Wait…I'm worried about that? I could die and I am worried about a stupid crab?

My legs hit the bottom of the rocky floor, turning over some rocks and I wanted the scream in pain from the impact of the bottom and as my foot got lodged between two big rocks.

I looked around at the bottom of the lake, knowing I couldn't be that far down with the amount of sun that still glimmered in the speckles of dirt floating in the cold water. There was no current, only coldness and I felt myself shivering, which wasn't good. Shivering took up more oxygen and I didn't exactly have an endless supply down here!

I tried to free my foot, but I could not, not alone. And then I felt a disturbance in the water and I looked up in plain relief to see Shane and Jason swimming over to me. But they were almost too late. Even now I was feeling and trying to ignore the light headedness, the blurriness of my darkening vision and the slowing of my heart as it failed to receive oxygen. I felt the fear pumping through my slowing veins and it clouded my sense, quickly turning to panic as I realized the fact I had been denying.

I am drowning.

I latched onto Shane as he came within reach and he grabbed back, trying to swim up, but he could not with my foot caught like it was. Jason tried to move the rock but failed. He always had been rather weak in arm strength. Shane pried my fingers from his shirt and swan down to help him. I felt the weight come off my foot and I felt Shane and Jason grab me again but I now lacked the strength to grab back. I let my head fall onto one of their shoulders and I closed my eyes, unable to keep them open any longer…

Coughing and sputtering with enough force to burst a lung, the sun back in my face and my brothers supporting me from either side. I panted, unable to take in a sufficient amount of air without coughing again and again to rid my lungs of the water.

When I finally got my breathing back under some amount of control, I felt the ground scrape against my cast and Jason picked me up and carried me the rest of the way to shore.

"TH-thank y-you." I whispered into his chest between bouts of fear and shivers. "I-I th-thought I was g-going to d-die."

"Not on our watch Nate." Shane breathed out, collapsing on the sandy beach, breathing hard.

I clung onto Jason tightly in the moments of silence, my heart finally calming down from the massive amounts of panic it housed.

"Why did you do it Nate?" Jason asked suddenly and I tensed.

Of course, this only back their idea of me being suicidal. And I don't think they would believe the truth either. But I had to try.

"I didn't." I told them, thankful the shivering was not hindering my weak voice. "Bailey pushed me…"

"Not this again Nate!" Shane said annoyance in his voice. "Bailey was the best thing that happened to you and you still blame her! Unbelievable!" He roared, standing up but not leaving.

I snorted. "Yeah the best thing in my life that tried to kill me." I closed my eyes in pure anger, not wanting to see the look of utter disbelief on Shane's face and the disappointment on Jason's. "Can one of you just bring me my stupid chair?" I asked, not caring for the bitterness in my voice.

"I got it here!" The witch's voice called and she ran over and I didn't need eyes to see the fake worry in her eyes. "What happened? Why are you all wet?"

"You should know." I growled, opening my eyes and pulling myself away from Jason and onto the chair. I rolled away before anyone else could speak. Just great. Now even Caitlyn would hate me. Bailey would make sure of that. I bet she even was watching us and that was what drove her over the edge. She was jealous. I am guessing that if se can't have me, than no one can. Oh the silly cliché's her stupid mind holds.

I need to get out of here. Out of camp. I will not be wanted here and as far as I know, they will kick me out and into the nearest insane asylum anyway. So what not just leave when I had the chance? I rolled out of camp, not stopping to take another look at the Camp Rock sign as I exited the boundaries without being noticed. Besides, I left the boundaries all the time to take walks, if anyone saw me, no one would think it weird.

Sometimes I wish I could just exhale all of my stress so I wouldn't become unglued. But I can't. It's just not me.

"Hey!" I wondered how many times I've heard that word today. "Wait up!" The girl called and I stopped on the trail ad looked over to see her running over. Her long dark hair swishing behind her, her dark eyes concerned. "You're Connect Three's Nate Grey!" She announced. "I'm Dana."

I shook her hand. "Nice to meet you. I suppose your wondering why I am in a wheel chair." I fathomed a guess but to my pleasant surprise, she shook her head.

"No, your ex pushed you out a window; anyone with eyes could see that. And let me guess, you are wet because she wanted you to take a little swim?" I nodded and she laughed at my amazement. "Running are you? Do you need a place to stay?" Again I nodded, more shamefully than anything. "It's alright; think of it as a thinking break instead of running away." She paused. "Come with me to my dad's camp. Come with me to Camp Star."

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**A/N: Don't you love that! I love it. It's amazing. More amazing than I could ever write. Most amazing plot twist EVER. (I wish I could take credit. I really, really can't. It's chibi again. Working her magic. -gives chibi a pitchfork- go wild. except Nick still has his. So watch your back.)**


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